mother, family, sky

“How do you do it?”: the reality of how we really do it

“How do you do it?”

Like most parents of a child with significant needs, I am asked this all the time – how do we manage Aysh and everything that comes with caring for him?

Some days the honest answer is – we don’t. Sometimes we suck at being disability parents (and sometimes we just suck at being parents!). We forget appointments, get frustrated, don’t take him to activities or events.

Other days it is hard work. We drag ourselves out of bed in the early hours of the morning because we woke screaming at shadows. We push him to do things for himself, he refuses and we do it for him – day after day after day.

It causes us to break down in tears when we can’t make it better for him; when his anxiety is so high that he tries to find release in head-banging. And nothing we do can ease his pain.

“How do we do it?”

We just do. There is no other option. We are parents. We love him and we want the best for him. Isn’t that what all parents do? Unconditional love and support. It is just what we do.